Report Cards!

Maybe I'm old school, but I can't understand the report cards the schools are sending home. What ever happened to "satisfactory", "not satisfactory", and "needs improvement"? Or the simple letter scale - A, B, C, D, and the dreaded F? Where's the old stand-by comment "Little Johnny is a pleasure to have in the class"? It appears the policy makers and child psychologists have brain stormed to devise a report card that leaves parents wondering if they should buy a special decoder, or worse yet, go back to school themselves to understand the comments.
Under Personal and Social Development, there's a sub-section labelled "displays an awareness of surroundings" and another entitled "understands the unique differences among individuals, families, schools, and the neighbourhood". Apparently my child "often demonstrates" such awareness. The highest level is "consistently demonstrates". Then there's "additional time and experience needed" and "sometimes demonstrates". Can't tell if there's an actual difference between "sometime" and "often". Also, why is it a good thing for a child to bring attention to the differences among others? I thought we were trying to be inclusive and teach acceptance? I also like the subsection "using problem-solving skills in a variety of social settings". Really, how many social settings could there possibly be in the classroom?!
Of course, I love the comments section. Apparently my child (at school) demonstrates self-reliance and a sense of responsibility, as well as self-motivation. Hmmm, that couldn't be my child who blames his spilled milk on his sister and says "I can't" when we ask him to put away his clean clothes.
Under the Language section, there's an area described as "displays an understanding and critical awareness when viewing media". Really? This from the boy who wants to know why he can't become the Hulk when he grows up? Or what about "understands and demonstrates critical thinking when engaged in the reading process". Would that be Devlin reading? And what is considered to be "critical thinking". Since he only sometimes demonstrates this skill, obviously we'd like to help him improve but how? The comments weren't helpful at all, although apparently he is using classroom resources to support his writing. Does that mean he's using a desk and pencil? Or that he's gazing upon the alphabet and copying the letters?
And I love the Arts section. My son, who can't carry a tune in a bucket, is now able to "sing songs while keeping a steady beat". The education system also monitors your development by how one "expresses responses to a variety of art forms from many cultures" and how one "demonstrates an awareness of themselves as artists, through engaging in activities in visual arts, music, drama and dance". When Devlin comes home and shows me the "dances" he's learned at school, I wonder if our tax dollars are going to waste! Under Health and Physical Activity, Devlin is learning to talk about safe and unsafe situations as they arise in the classroom. Why don't they teach it's unsafe to jump down 5 steps from the stairs, especially when your baby sister is on the last step. Or that it's unsafe to slide the stairs inside the laundry basket. I like the comment that Devlin is beginning to demonstrate balance, whole-body and hand-eye coordination and flexibility of movement. Why does he fall off the chair at dinner time then?
I long for the easy to understand report cards of yesterday. (Do I sound old?) I just want to know if my child is getting along with others. Does he show respect for the teachers? Is he able to stand in line, or does he continually have to be reprimanded? Can he put on his snowpants and boots by himself, because he can never seem to do that at home. Does he share toys with his mates without being prompted? Is he enjoying story time? Does he show an interest in picking out books that don't showcase a superhero? Can he count without skipping numbers? Is he starting to understand that when he has 3 cookies, he can give one to Ceilidh and one to Aisling and still have one to himself? For some reason, at home, having 3 cookies and two siblings to share means he will have none. (Okay, that might be true, because if you're not fast enough, Aisling will eat the remaining cookie.)